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Clever Facebook Status
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I know it’s not big and it’s not clever but F..bad.. me it’s funny!
No I didnt trip The floor looked like it needed a hug
My Friend ask me, How is your life? I said she is fine.
You can kill your attraction to anyone by watching them chew.
If nobody love you, then you are doing something wrong..!
Confession is good for the soul, but bad for your career.
I am not failed, Because my success is lost.!
Warning, its not safe to talk to me at the moment..
Types something clever to get people to like my status :)
Love doesn’t show up on an X-ray… but it’s there.
Rules are made to the break!
All man are not fools, some stay bachelors.!
Relationships are like yard sales, are great fun few hundred feet away, but realize that it is just a bunch of junk that is not necessary.
My boss said “Dress for the job you want, not the job you have.” Now I’m sitting in a disciplinary meeting dressed as Batman.
I have an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other. I’m also deaf in one ear.
I’m paying my taxes with a smile, but they wrote me back saying they want cash.
Sometimes it’s better to be alone so that nobody hurts you.
When you have a good imagination, you can make up all the facts you want!
Alarm clocks should come with sounds like “tiny doll feet scampering into the closet” because I am not hitting snooze when I hear that.
Hell is a never-ending Instagram account of a girl who just got a new boyfriend.